The Burden of Emotions

For me, emotions have always been hard to understand or to deal with. I understand basic emotions like happiness, sadness and anger, but there are times where things can get a bit confusing. Like whenever I am really angry or frustrated, I just end up being so overwhelmed that I just cry.  Crying is usually associated with sadness. There are also times where I just don’t know what I am feeling. 

I think I get this way because I never really learned how to deal with my emotions in a healthy manner. Part of this is because I grew up watching people very close to me get set off by every little thing. This often made me feel like I was the one who had to apologize. Also, when I would go to them to complain, they would make me feel like my emotions weren't a big deal and often didn’t want to listen. 

“Cast your burden on the Lord, and He will sustain you; He will never allow the righteous to be shaken” Psalm 55:22 (CSB)

Something that has often been a struggle for me to remember is that God wants us to come to Him with everything that burdens us. He wants us to come when we are sad, angry, frustrated, or even don’t know what we are feeling. Our burdens become His burdens. I have found that when I do decide to come to God with my emotions, a weight has been lifted off my shoulders, even if  the situation has not changed. 

This discovery came when I decided to go to therapy. I was really nervous and reluctant to go because I often pictured  therapy as “oh there is something wrong with you and you need professional help.” Thankfully, my spiritual leader in college pushed me to pray and think about it. She told me that therapy really is just talking to someone who can help you process the difficult things in life. Therapy should not be seen as something is wrong with you but instead a place where you can vent to someone who will  listen to you and give you tips to help you process things in a healthy way. 

Though it was very challenging and draining for me at times, pushing me emotionally in ways I was not comfortable with nor had ever experienced, I grew from it. I learned  not only to be  honest with myself on how I was feeling but also with God. He can handle our honesty, even if that is expressing being mad at Him. Trusting that I could cast my emotional burdens on Him allowed me to begin emotional healing.  

That emotional healing also helped me realize the Bible shows Jesus experiencing all of the emotions we deal with. (John 2:14-16, Luke 7:12-15) I have found that having a prayer journal has been super helpful to me. It allows me to write to God about my emotions and what I am feeling even if it doesn't always make sense. Sometimes while I am journaling my emotions start to make sense and I get some more insight on why I am feeling the way I do.

While I am still on this journey of learning how to honestly process my emotions, I am thankful God cares for me and takes all my burdens. He continually sustains me and I am grateful.