God of the Impossible
If I were to describe myself to you, I would tell you that I can be a hot mess at times. After years of trauma and abuse, I developed a habit of trying to prevent any further pain in my life and in the lives of those I love. If by chance I failed and unwanted hurt did make its way through my protective barriers, I quickly would do everything I could to fix it or keep it from getting any worse. The problem with this type of living is that it’s just not sustainable. Not only did it drain me mentally and emotionally, but it prolonged the inevitable nightmare I feared most of all: a problem so big that it would be impossible for me to prevent and fix at all.
My greatest fear and nightmare made its way into my family this past Christmas when the strained relationship between two of my children finally imploded. There was no hope that I could ever fix this perilous situation. What does a person do when the pain of two people you love has come to a place of impossible reconciliation? The only thing you can do is turn to the God of the impossible.
“But Jesus looked at them and said, “With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.” Matthew 19:26 (emphasis mine)
In my heartache and tremendous pain, I prayed to my God of the impossible. Normally when I prayed in times like these, I would tell God how I needed Him to fix it. But instead, I now prayed prayers like this: “God, this situation is hopeless and beyond repair. It feels like a death to their relationship in a way to where our family will never be whole again. But I know what is impossible for me, is never impossible for You. So all I am asking You to do is to help me trust in You, God of the impossible.”
While nothing between my two children changed in the weeks and months that followed, God transformed me. By allowing God to be God, I found Him to be my peace, hope, comfort and healer. He healed from the paralyzing pain and emotional weight that kept me anxious all day long. Also, He brought me mental freedom. In the past, thoughts of “what ifs”, “should haves” and “if onlys” would constantly do laps inside my mind, but now I was freed to enjoy the abundant life promised to me in Christ (John 10:10).
“For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worth comparing with the glory that is to be revealed to us.” Romans 8:18
As an update, God is moving in the impossible! While my two children have not been reconciled yet, there is hope. When or how long that will take, I do not know. What I do know is that “He who began a good work in [them] will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ” Philippians 1:6 (emphasis mine). I also know God owes me nothing more in my lifetime. One day our family will be whole again, because He is the God of the impossible.
So whatever seems impossible for you, I hope this encourages you to know there is One you can turn to!
